3 ways parents compete at custody

When parents go through a divorce, the bitter fallout can severely affect their children. Hence, it is crucial for both parents to try and minimize the conflict and competition between themselves.

Yet, some parents struggle. If you fear your spouse is one of those people, here are some things to watch out for after your divorce:

#1. They compete on holidays

You take your child to Disney World in Florida, so your ex takes them to Disney World in Paris.

#2. They compete on things at home

Your ex wants the child to spend more time staying with them than you. So they promise the child they can redecorate their room and hire an interior designer to the stars to take charge. Or perhaps they offer to buy them the pet you have always refused because you know your child is not yet capable of looking after it.

#3. They compete at volunteering

Perhaps they volunteer to coach the kids’ baseball, despite always telling you they hate the sport. Or they turn up to every parent’s evening with trays of cupcakes for the teachers.

How should you react?

You need to try not to. Just be yourself, the parent your kids love you for. If your ex can afford to spend more than you or give up more time than you, do not get into problems trying to compete. Consider that your children might benefit from what your spouse is doing, even if your ex is doing things for the wrong reasons

You cannot control your co-parent’s thinking. All you can do is consider what is best for your child. That should be the basis of all co-parenting decisions.


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