If you and your spouse are thinking about divorcing, are currently navigating a divorce or have recently finalized one, you are likely concerned about what the divorce process may ultimately do to both you and your loved ones. If you have kids, you are likely concerned about what your marital tension and/or divorce is doing to them. There is no question that marital tension and/or divorce can have temporary negative effects on kids and teens. However, if you are a loving parent and are committed to helping your kids through this rough time, you can absolutely work towards ensuring that they are happy and healthy moving forward.
Divorce is sometimes beneficial for kids and teens. Numerous recent studies have confirmed that kids and teens generally do worse in home environments in which marital tension is high than they do in homes where parental stress is low. Therefore, one of the best things you can do for your children is to be a healthy, happy and low-stress influence. If you are happy and healthy, it will generally be easier for your kids and teens to be happy and healthy as well.
It is also important for you to be honest with your kids in age-appropriate ways. As you strive to build a happy and healthy household, you should build it upon foundations of honesty and integrity. Kids are naturally observant, as they tend to learn most of their behaviors first by observing parents and others engaging in them. If you are dishonest with your kids, they will likely either sense that something is wrong or feel betrayed when they learn the truth.
Finally, do not be afraid to show your kids extra affection at this time. Genuine affection will not spoil your kids and it just may help them to heal.
Source: The Huffington Post, “5 Ways to Help Your Kids Thrive After Divorce,” Samantha Rodman, May 28, 2015